Myrical

A Changed Life

In one way, my story is not unique. I am a person created of God with a sin nature who has trusted in God’s Son for redemption and been not only gloriously saved from sin and spiritual death to a new eternal life in Him, but also gloriously changed to be a new person in Christ. God has this purpose and plan of salvation for each and every one of us. He wants to have a dynamic, intimate relationship with us through the sacrifice of His precious Son, Jesus. The Bible says that He is not willing that any should perish. Yet, He leaves the choice up to us.

I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour as a young child. Trusting Him as Saviour did not mean that I never had trials. God has allowed me to go through physical hardships, moves, financial difficulties and other life challenges. Through it all, though, God has been teaching me, guiding me, loving me, and providing for me. His Word and time spent with Him in prayer have been my source of comfort and sustenance.

As I grew, many people would have said that I was a “good Christian.” I went to church, read my Bible, prayed, avoided the “big” sins, and even served in a Christian ministry. God even was amazingly able to use me to bring others to Him. (I never cease to stand in awe of what God can accomplish through His children - frail and broken as we are.) However, although I knew Christ as my Saviour, I was not loving Him with my all or relying on Him to fulfill my every need. My focus was all about me, not others. I was needy and some may have said that I had low self-esteem. But in reality, I esteemed self very, very highly. Often, my disability was used to draw attention to myself or, sadly, even to make things go my way. During those years, God was working in my life as a Father does with a child, molding me, making me, and bringing me to a place where I recognized my self-will and my needs and was willing to turn to Him.

It was in 2004 and into 2005 that God really chastened me in order to bring me closer to Himself. God took everything away that I held dear. After nearly 15 years on my own in a ministry I loved, health difficulties forced me to move back to my parent’s home one thousand miles away. Not only did I leave a job and friends that I loved behind, but one close friend even went Home to be with God just a few days after I moved. I was fearful, filled with self, and very needy although I had not yet recognized these things.

In this condition far from God, my loving, merciful Heavenly Father reached out to me by introducing me to some very dear friends and using them to draw me closer to Himself. Their love for God was different than I had ever seen or known before as they truly strove to live each moment Biblically, to base every decision on what the Bible taught and to always love and forgive as Christ loves and forgives, no matter what. In the coming weeks and months, they prayed fervently for me while patiently putting up with my selfishness, lovingly taking me back to God’s Word and continually reminding me of how truly powerful and awesome our God is.

Through their living out God’s command to be salt and light, I have become thirstier for God than ever before and am being drawn away from the darkness of self into His light. These changes have been and continue to be difficult and wonderful all at the same time. God’s work in my life has meant much confession, repentance, and seeking of forgiveness from many that I had wronged with my selfish attitude over the years and also when I stumble. It means that freedom and joy are growing in my heart, mind, and soul. Jeremiah 29:13 has become real to me as I seek and find my God and Saviour. ” 13And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.”

One verse that God is using to work in my heart and life is Luke 10:27, “²⁷And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.” I strive to live this verse in God’s strength, not my own. It is amazing what has and is changing as I seek to love God with my all. My focus is shifting from fears, uncertainties, aches, pains, and frustrating people to trusting my daily trials to an all-loving, all-powerful God and seeing others through my love for Him.

Slowly, a patient God was (and is) transforming my life. God continues to teach me the truth of this quote from Revive Our Hearts “Anything that makes me long for God is a blessing. Anything that makes me desperate for Him, anything that brings me to the end of my own resources, my own strength, my own power, that’s a good thing. Thank God if He is creating circumstances to make you desperate for Him, and then you seek the Lord with diligence.” He also shows me that while I can not ignore my disability, my focus should be on Him and His working through it rather than the disability. I am to glorify Him in everything. (2 Corinthians 6:1-10)

The disability and chronic illnesses that I focused so much on before have now become vehicles for blessing. (I must admit that there are days that I have to remind my heart of this fact, but God is faithful!) I now can truly thank God for these trials. Praising Him for what I once despised. Only God can change someone’s heart like that!

Another outcome of this growing relationship with God is that the more I learn of His perfect love, the more my fears are vanishing just as He promises. I John 4:18, ” 18There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” Peace and joy are coming into my inner being even when things are falling apart around me.

There are many, many other areas that God has worked in my life and many Scriptures that have become so precious to me - some of which are shared in the posts of this blog. I stand in awe of how God (and God alone) can change a person from self, frustration and fear to glorifying Him, love and peace! And, yes, He is still working on me. God continues to convict, love and change me as I draw near to Him. Oh, how I want to know Him more! To God be the glory, great things He hath done!

I also long for others to know the peace, freedom, joy, and love of knowing God intimately. This amazing God longs to show You His love and give you peace and contentment as well.