This year, God has been teaching me flexibility and spontaneity. These lessons first came through the weakness, fatigue, and pain that overtook my life and schedule through the chronic illness. Planning was impossible as fatigue crashes could happen at any time and last for long periods of time. Oh, how hard these lessons were. Yet, I began to give my days to God each morning and watched as He structured my day. He was teaching me priority with very limited resources. These lessons were precious.
Consider these verses.
Proverbs 16:9 "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." (ESV)
Isaiah 55:8-9 "8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. "
Psalm 31:15a "My times are in your hand;..."
God, in His sovereignty and for His glory, allowed me to have my health back with a new treatment. It was His doing, not mine. He was in control. He is in control. He continues to teach me to leave my life in His hands. (He does a much better job of it than I ever could!")
My new condition has also been used of God to teach me that my life is in His hands. My health continues to improve daily. Yet, this condition means that my body will not handle acute illness or severe injury without quick medical intervention. It reminds me daily that my life is truly in God's hands. What a wonderful reminder!
His hand is a good place to be. He loves me.
Jeremiah 31:3 "3 The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee."
John 3:16 "16 “For God so loved the world,[a] that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life."
As I daily see that my times are in the hands of the one who loves me, I see that I also want to use it for his glory, to get to know Him and His Word, to love Him, and to serve Him. When He takes me home, I will see Him face to face.
Philippians 1:21-23, "21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. 22 If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. 23 I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better."
1 Corinthians 13:12 "12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known."
I submit to His will for my life. He is a wonderful Savior even when I don't understand all His ways! He loves me and holds me in His hands. That is sufficient!